Harbors

The Lord is a harbor
A refuge for me
A corner of safety
In tumultuous seas

Before I met Jesus
Gentle Mother was there
Shielding from danger
With her tender care

The Lord used my Mama
To gather me in
She was the gateway
To comfort with Him

When I was rejected
Devalued and scorned
A shelter she offered
In her caring arms

The Lord is a harbor
My mother is, too
Together their kindness
Has carried me through

Upheavals and hardships
Raging waves of the sea
My days are not lacking
Pain and difficulty

In the midst of the heartache
What solace I’ve known
My Lord and my mother
Both calling me home

Gifts from the Father
Each thoughtful deed
Love in abundance
Lavished on me

I’ll ever be thankful
For compassion so sweet
The Lord and my mother
My shelters of peace

Sharing Life with Mom

Each day comes
With thoughts and news
Little things
To bring to you

Like gathering flowers
Picked as I go
I gathered them up
Waiting to show you

Funny or sad
Mundane or rare
Our daily existence
Always shared

Hearts intertwined
An unparalleled linked
Your fabric is mine
What I feel and think

A part of each other
Mother and child
Deepest connection
Melded for life

Agony now
Torn and raw
But enemy death
You are horribly wrong

This sacred love
It cannot die
It lives despite you
Separation’s a lie

Eternally bonded
My mother and me
Soon back together
You wait and see

I’ll be there with her
In paradise, home
Life everlasting
I’ll know and be known

Closer than ever
Death just a door
Into a new realm
More than before

Nearness unshackled
By sin and shame
Two souls communing
My loss is my gain

Only a breath
Between here and there
Until then collecting
Flowers to share

I’m gathering up, Mom
What I know you would like
How my family’s doing
What I’ve done with my life

You told me to write
To enjoy each new day
Good things are coming
You always would say

Grandchildren will bless you
Retirement, too
You and Daryl will prosper
You’ll see it’s true

Mama, I’ll cherish
Your words and your heart
Our special connection
Will carry me far

You’re now there waiting
To share with me
Your daily existence
In a land that is free

Unfettered devotion
Unexplainable love
You long to tell me
What it’s like up above

How Jesus has loved you
Just like I said
How every heartache
Every pain, every dread

Was gone in an instant
When you saw His face
Entering heaven
A miraculous place

I’ll be there shortly
My mother, dear friend
We’ll be together
Sharing life once again

June 20, 2021

When God Comes Near

When God comes near
He wounds you
You don’t get what
You expect

Ease and strength
Are absent
Disappointment
In their stead

Confused you ask
The question
Why does this
Hurt so much?

You went to Him
For comfort
But left wounded
By His touch

Jacob asked for blessing
But pain was the result
He wanted God to help him
But it ended in assault

Jesus asked for blessing
Remove this cup from me
The father denied his pleading
And hung him from a tree

When God comes near he wounds you
Ignores cries for relief
But in the end the blessing
Beyond what you can see

Jacob’s sons God honored
Forever to be seen
No way to know Jacob’s wounding
Would lead to prosperity

Jesus scorned and beaten
Undeservedly
But he knew what was coming
Life for you and me

When God comes near
He wounds you
When God comes near
There’s pain

But if you accept
The suffering and death
Your loss will be
Great gain

Grief

Grief invades

And overtakes

Barreling into

Each moment awake



Grief demands

Attention here

Plummets me

Into despair



Grief the bully

Reminding me

Of the one I’ve been

The ones I’ve known



What if I stood

Up from the earth

To which I’m bent

And searched



Is there something

In grief’s end

That can become

A friend?



A teacher?

A guide?

Leading me to

What’s deeper inside



Exquisite pain

Of all things lost

Jesus hanging

On the cross



Bowed there

For a time

In agony and grief

That was mine



Only to see

Grief ends

For you

For me



Grief now tender

As made new

It renders

Hope

This Little Light of Mine

Last night my Torbie cat, Georgia, attacked our sliding glass door. It’s not something she does a lot, but on occasion we have a visiting feline that she takes issue with.

When that intruder appears on the other side of the glass, she goes after it, however unsuccessfully.

But last night when I heard her scratch at the glass pane, I didn’t see the offending cat. Yet Georgia kept peering outside. I knew she saw something out there.

I got down on my hands and knees near where Georgia had stationed herself, trying to make out in the dim light what was under our patio furniture keeping her rapt attention.

Then I spied a furry lump in the darkness under a patio chair. I could tell it was breathing since the fur was moving up and down. That was no cat.

I called my husband to take a look. He opened the bright flashlight feature on his phone and that little creature scurried away like a shot.

In a split second I reacted and flew outside to follow it. It was nowhere to be seen. I halted and began to move stealthily from a chair to the ottoman to the other chair to the sofa.

Nothing.

We have covers on our outdoor furniture since it’s not quite warm enough to take them off, so I decided to chance it and shake the covers to see if anything would pop out.

That did the trick.

Out from under a chair hurried a large, gray thick-tailed, bug-eyed rat. It rushed across the patio and I screamed. It ran into the corner and up the fence.

I approached it and made some strange sounds. I thought I might make it leave our yard and head back into the forest, or from wherever it came.

But nope.

It scratched it’s way down the fence post and ran across the path right in front of me. I screamed again. It skittered across the rocks, under our rosemary bush and out of sight.

Loving the Light

Rats love the darkness and fear the exposure that the brightness of light brings. It can be the same with people.

Jesus said,

And this is the judgment: the light has come into the world, and people loved the darkness rather than the light because their works were evil.

For everyone who does wicked things hates the light and does not come to the light, lest his works should be exposed.

But whoever does what is true comes to the light, so that it may be clearly seen that his works have been carried out in God.

John 3:19-21

The Light of the World came to dwell in us. To make our darkness light.  To shine out from within us to a hurting world.

John the Baptist was a burning, shining lamp that shone on the path leading to Jesus. (John 1:6-8; 5:35)

Jesus said that we, too, are lights that shine for him if we believe.

You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden. Nor do people light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a stand, and it gives light to all in the house.

In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father in heaven.

Matthew 5:14-16

Gifts in the Light

My close encounter with the rat last night reminded me that we have nothing to fear from the light.

That little creature reacted by instinct. It assumed that exposure meant danger.

It had no way of knowing that I would not have harmed it.

Thankfully, the Bible never compares us to rats. But we sometimes act like they do, running from light that would help us, not harm us.

Forfeiting the joy and freedom of exchanging or darkness for light.

Ignoring the opportunity to be a shining, burning lamp that brings glory to God and pleasure from him.

Dear Jesus, give us the grace to come to you into the light. Shine your beams of love into our darkest places. Cleanse us and make our hearts into lamps that burn brightly for you. For your glory and for our good. Amen.

Love

Love is longsuffering and kind

It does not envy or brag

Love is not arrogant or inelegant

It does not look out for number one

Love does not get exasperated easily

Nor keep a list of wrongs it suffers

Love is not happy with evil but

It rejoices when truth prevails

Love covers and protects

It believes the best

Love anticipates good

And always perseveres

Love never ends

3 Crucial Life Lessons from a Father’s Failure

He fell off his seat backward, broke his neck and died. That’s how life ended for Eli, the high priest.

I’ve read the story of Eli, his corrupt sons, the routing of the Israelites by the enemy Philistines and the capturing of the precious Ark of the Covenant many times.

But today when I read it, it made me cry. For Eli.

Even though this God-appointed priest seems to have started out well, Eli’s forty years in that position did not result in the godly legacy that he might have hoped for.

Failed Fatherhood

Eli’s sons were priests like their father. But the Bible calls them sons of Belial – worthless, good-for-nothings.

They did not know the Lord.

They stole from those who came to offer sacrifices.

They defiled the house of God by laying with the women who served there.

It appeared that they did whatever lustful thing they desired, robbing and abusing the people who came to worship and serve.

How did these rebellious sons get away with their debauchery? Sadly, Eli didn’t hinder them. All he did was warn them that their behavior was deadly, saying,

“If one man sins against another, God will mediate for him; but if a man sins against the Lord, who can intercede for him?” (1 Samuel 2:25a).

But those words of warning did nothing to stop them and the Bible tells us why.

“But they would not listen to the voice of their father, for the Lord desired to put them to death.” (1 Samuel 2:25b)

Why did the Lord want to put them to death? It’s likely because Eli and his sons had been dishonoring God and the people for quite some time. Their time to repent was up.

God sent a prophet to rebuke Eli for putting his sons before God and making themselves fat with the choicest of every offering that the people brought to the sanctuary. God tells Eli that his bloodline will be cut off and his legacy ended in disgrace.

A Great Loss

Eli arrived at the end of his long life a weak, overweight, disgraced man. What sent him over the edge to death was the capturing of the Ark of the Covenant.

The enemy Philistines stole the precious presence of God from their midst. There was nothing left. Eli had been caring for the ark for forty years and now it was gone.

Now Eli was ninety-eight years old, and his eyes were set so that he could not see.  The man said to Eli, “I am the one who came from the battle line. Indeed, I escaped from the battle line today.” And he said, “How did things go, my son?” Then the one who brought the news replied, “Israel has fled before the Philistines and there has also been a great slaughter among the people, and your two sons also, Hophni and Phinehas, are dead, and the ark of God has been taken.” When he mentioned the ark of God, Eli fell off the seat backward beside the gate, and his neck was broken and he died, for he was old and heavy. Thus he judged Israel forty years. (1 Samuel 3:15-18)

Eli failed.

He was gluttonous and greedy.

He raised sons who were lustful and treacherous.

He couldn’t protect the ark of God.

Eli lost.

He lost his opportunity to leave a legacy of holiness and fidelity to God.

He lost his sons who the Lord himself killed.

He lost the most precious object on the planet, the ark, the carrier of the presence of God.

He couldn’t control himself.

There are only a couple of times in the Bible that we read that someone is heavy. This is one of them. Eli ate more than the priest’s share of the offerings that the people brought.

He couldn’t control his sons.

Hophni and Phineas were adults, but they were ungodly priests whose behavior should never have been allowed to go on.

I never used to relate to Eli. I saw him as a man who make huge mistakes and paid for it. I saw him as weak but never anything like me. That has changed.

God’s Mercy in Our Weakness

Now that I’m older, and I’ve raised my two sons into adulthood, I see the story somewhat differently. I can relate to Eli’s mistakes.

Maybe I was too hard on my oldest son when he was a teenager.

Maybe I didn’t require enough of my youngest.

There were times when I lacked self-control and raised my voice.

Did I ever place them above the Lord in my heart?

It amazes me that God gives these tiny helpless humans to parents who are so imperfect. In our 20’s and 30’s we haven’t yet learned so many lessons that would make us better parents.

We still tend to be selfish, impatient and lacking compassion. It’s parenting that helps to mature us, but in the process our kids can get hurt.

It’s painful. The past can’t be changed.

I can ask for forgiveness. I can do things differently now. That’s all good. But I can’t alter the consequences that came from my choices.

My hope and peace come from knowing that God loves and forgives and works all things together for good for those who are called and who love him. (Romans 8:28).

I’m grateful for that promise because I need him to work out a lot!

As hard as it is to see my mistakes, it gives me empathy for people like Eli.

The Bible tells us about folks with less than stellar records on purpose.

We relate to their weakness.

We learn to ask for wisdom in our choices, so we avoid the same mistakes.

3 Life Lessons from Eli

  1. Love and honor God above everyone and everything. Eli and his sons put themselves before God.

Therefore the Lord, the God of Israel, declares: ‘I promised that your house and the house of your father should go in and out before me forever,’ but now the Lord declares: ‘Far be it from me, for those who honor me I will honor, and those who despise me shall be lightly esteemed. (1 Samuel 2:30)

And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength. (Mark 12:30)

  1. Don’t wait to turn around. Eli and his sons didn’t turn from their sins.

And I declare to him that I am about to punish his house forever, for the iniquity that he knew, because his sons were blaspheming God, and he did not restrain them. (1 Samuel 3:13)

For godly grief produces a repentance that leads to salvation without regret, whereas worldly grief produces death. (2 Corinthians 7:10)

  1. Develop self-control. Eli and his sons didn’t restrain their lusts.

Why then do you scorn my sacrifices and my offerings that I commanded for my dwelling, and honor your sons above me by fattening yourselves on the choicest parts of every offering of my people Israel?’ (1 Samuel 2:29)

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. Galatians 5:22-23

There is Hope

Eli, Hophni and Phineas came to a terrible end.

Sadly, there are people all around us that go down the same road. We see it in the news and in our own backyard. But it doesn’t have to be that way!

If we will surrender our hearts to the Lord, he will give us the ability to love and honor him first and above all and not make our children into idols, serving them first.

The Holy Spirit will lovingly convict us of our sin so that we can repent and be set free from the burden and shame. One day at a time.

He will give us the fruit of self-control so that we do not fall into temptation.

There is always hope!

God sees, knows and cares. We can find encouragement in the fact that he will never stop working all things out for our good and for his glory.

For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.  Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will hear you. – Jeremiah 29:11-12

By the Hand of Jesus

By the hand to wholeness

By the hand to light

Delivered from his darkness

A blind man granted sight

 

Friends implored the teacher

To heal this pitied man

Tearful prayers were answered

When He took him by the hand

 

Dear daughter laying lifeless

Then taken by the hand

Came back to health as Jesus

Called to His little lamb

 

Jesus changed it all that day

As weeping turned to dance

Grief became amazement

As He took her by the hand

 

The loving hand of Jesus

With strength and gentleness

Removes our heavy burdens

Relieves all our distress

 

Shining light into our darkness

Restoring life with one command

Jesus changes everything

When He takes us by the hand

The Source of True Strength

In our house, we have a multi-purpose room. What’s in there? My computer, printer, filing cabinet, stationary bicycle, a guitar and a 6-foot table sporting boxes of photographs as I’m working through scanning them all.

On the wall is a gun rack and a picture with a quote about faith from Corrie Ten Boom. It’s an eclectic room. One of the things that takes up the most space is my son’s weight bench, sidled by an intimidating stack of weights and two 20-pound dumbbells.

I can barely pick up any of the weights, while the men in my house pick them up like they are made of paper. The men in my house are a lot stronger than me.

But the strongest man who ever lived is someone we read about in the Bible in the book of Judges. His name was Samson.

The Strong Man

Samson was the deadliest threat that his enemies, the Philistines, had ever seen.

We pick up the story after he had humiliated their leaders with a riddle they couldn’t solve.  He destroyed their grain fields by putting torches between the tails of 300 foxes, tying them together and sending them running through the fields.

He had broken through ropes like they were thread and killed 1,000 men with the jawbone of a donkey.

Samson had to be stopped.

After this he [Samson] loved a woman in the Valley of Sorek, whose name was Delilah. And the lords of the Philistines came up to her and said to her, “Seduce him, and see where his great strength lies, and by what means we may overpower him, that we may bind him to humble him. And we will each give you 1,100 pieces of silver.” Judges 16:4-5

They couldn’t stop him with their hands, so they had to go through his heart. They promised a huge reward to Delilah if she could find out the secret to his strength. Delilah consented.

After a few tries, Samson finally spilled the beans. His strength lay in his uncut hair. That long hair was a symbol of the Nazirite. The evidence of his devotion to God.

Once his hair was gone, so was his might.

Of course, it wasn’t really his hair that made him strong. It was his relationship to God. A Nazirite was set apart for service to the Lord, not drinking wine or strong drink, and avoiding contact with dead bodies, eating according to the Mosaic Law.

By revealing to Delilah that his hair was the secret to his immense strength, Samson betrayed his vow to God and forfeited the blessings that came with it. Including his power to protect his people and himself.

The Weak Man

In verse five of chapter 16, the lords of the Philistines tell Delilah that they want her to “seduce him, and see where his great strength lies, and by what means we may overpower him, that we may bind him to humble him.”

The word translated “humble” is the Hebrew word “anah”, which can also be translated “humiliate”, “afflict”, “oppress” and includes the idea of browbeating and looking down upon someone.

Samson became a source of gloating and amusement for the Philistines after they cut off his hair and he became as powerless as they were. Samson’s foolish confession to a woman he loved resulted in the loss of his strength, honor, integrity and ultimately, his life.

In the end, God granted Samson one last act of power as he caused the building to collapse on the Philistines and himself. But he was defeated and humiliated. Just as the Philistines wanted.

True Strength

The true strength of a man is not in how much he can bench press or how tall he is. It doesn’t increase if he’s in law enforcement or if he’s a professional athlete. A man’s power is in his connection to God.

As long as Samson kept his vow to God to leave his hair uncut, he had whatever power he needed to defeat his enemies. After he broke his promise, he became the laughingstock of the region and has gone down in human history as a fool.

It’s a blessing to have strong men around the house to lift what I cannot. They open jar lids that are stuck, tote heavy boxes into the attic and move furniture around with ease.

But if there were no men in the house or they were not able to do these things, we could still get them done one way or another. That’s why jar-opening tools and hand trucks were created.

However, there is no substitute for a man whose life is devoted to God. The man who finds his strength in Him.

Wisdom, uprightness, faith, patience and perseverance show the true power of a man.

The man who stands firmly devoted to God even in temptation, is the man who will prosper and fulfill God’s unique and vital plan for his life.

Even if he’s no Mr. Universe.

“The way of the Lord is strength to the upright…” Proverbs 10:29a

“Let Your hand be upon the man of Your right hand, upon the son of man whom You made strong for Yourself.” Psalm 80:17

“You, therefore, my son, be strong in the grace that is in Christ Jesus.” 2 Timothy 2:1

“A wise man is strong, yes, a man of knowledge increases strength. For by wise counsel you will wage your own war…” Proverbs 24:5-6a

God of the Waters

 

Sparkling, rumbling, swishing

A bouncing, dancing, stream

In hidden celebration

Of life that’s truly free

 

A little girl exploring

Spies the happy display

Joins the joyful dancing

Delighted in the play

 

Vast Pacific Ocean

Mighty, majestic and grand

Your forceful waves are crashing

Against the cliffs and sand

 

A woman’s heart seeks solace

She finds near you God’s peace

With power and with passion

Your soothing waves don’t cease

 

Mighty Lord of every ocean

Kind Lord of every stream

Both very great and small things

You’ve made to speak to me

 

For my joy and for my comfort

Your waters always rise

Their beauty and their power

Fill my heart and eyes

 

You draw me ever closer

By the waters that you’ve made

Whether by flowing or by crashing

They’re calling out your name

 

Then I join in with them

As I shout and I sing

To the glorious God of the waters

Grateful praises to my King