Harbors

The Lord is a harbor
A refuge for me
A corner of safety
In tumultuous seas

Before I met Jesus
Gentle Mother was there
Shielding from danger
With her tender care

The Lord used my Mama
To gather me in
She was the gateway
To comfort with Him

When I was rejected
Devalued and scorned
A shelter she offered
In her caring arms

The Lord is a harbor
My mother is, too
Together their kindness
Has carried me through

Upheavals and hardships
Raging waves of the sea
My days are not lacking
Pain and difficulty

In the midst of the heartache
What solace I’ve known
My Lord and my mother
Both calling me home

Gifts from the Father
Each thoughtful deed
Love in abundance
Lavished on me

I’ll ever be thankful
For compassion so sweet
The Lord and my mother
My shelters of peace

Sharing Life with Mom

Each day comes
With thoughts and news
Little things
To bring to you

Like gathering flowers
Picked as I go
I gathered them up
Waiting to show you

Funny or sad
Mundane or rare
Our daily existence
Always shared

Hearts intertwined
An unparalleled linked
Your fabric is mine
What I feel and think

A part of each other
Mother and child
Deepest connection
Melded for life

Agony now
Torn and raw
But enemy death
You are horribly wrong

This sacred love
It cannot die
It lives despite you
Separation’s a lie

Eternally bonded
My mother and me
Soon back together
You wait and see

I’ll be there with her
In paradise, home
Life everlasting
I’ll know and be known

Closer than ever
Death just a door
Into a new realm
More than before

Nearness unshackled
By sin and shame
Two souls communing
My loss is my gain

Only a breath
Between here and there
Until then collecting
Flowers to share

I’m gathering up, Mom
What I know you would like
How my family’s doing
What I’ve done with my life

You told me to write
To enjoy each new day
Good things are coming
You always would say

Grandchildren will bless you
Retirement, too
You and Daryl will prosper
You’ll see it’s true

Mama, I’ll cherish
Your words and your heart
Our special connection
Will carry me far

You’re now there waiting
To share with me
Your daily existence
In a land that is free

Unfettered devotion
Unexplainable love
You long to tell me
What it’s like up above

How Jesus has loved you
Just like I said
How every heartache
Every pain, every dread

Was gone in an instant
When you saw His face
Entering heaven
A miraculous place

I’ll be there shortly
My mother, dear friend
We’ll be together
Sharing life once again

June 20, 2021

Her Light

When she died I died. Not literally, but in many ways.

The light went out. The light that had kept me warm.

Night and day that light was there to shine on me, bringing love and joy and encouragement.

And now it’s gone dark. But not literally.

In reality, her light is shining brighter than ever in a place where there is no night.

No shadow. No darkness at all.

Just light.

Where her light is subsumed in that greater light.

Of God.

Of love.

For a time I can no longer feel its warmth. That light that was with me all my life.

But it still glows. Ever brighter and clearer and fuller.

Just not here.

With me.

Which is all I can see.

So darkness hovers.

Just there.

Haunting.

Taunting.

Tempting to despair.

Her light would show me a better way. Even now.

Look up.

Can you glimpse her light there?

Somewhere?

Just out of reach.

Behind the veil.

Of tears.

And time.

This life of mine.

Treading on in spite of the absence of that light.

That love.

It’s left me.

But above it shines. So bright.

And one day that light will shine on me again.

When God Comes Near

When God comes near
He wounds you
You don’t get what
You expect

Ease and strength
Are absent
Disappointment
In their stead

Confused you ask
The question
Why does this
Hurt so much?

You went to Him
For comfort
But left wounded
By His touch

Jacob asked for blessing
But pain was the result
He wanted God to help him
But it ended in assault

Jesus asked for blessing
Remove this cup from me
The father denied his pleading
And hung him from a tree

When God comes near he wounds you
Ignores cries for relief
But in the end the blessing
Beyond what you can see

Jacob’s sons God honored
Forever to be seen
No way to know Jacob’s wounding
Would lead to prosperity

Jesus scorned and beaten
Undeservedly
But he knew what was coming
Life for you and me

When God comes near
He wounds you
When God comes near
There’s pain

But if you accept
The suffering and death
Your loss will be
Great gain

Solid Ground in Troubled Times

“On Christ the solid rock I stand;
All other ground is sinking sand.”

These words arose in my heart this morning as I was praying and pondering the condition of our country. A global pandemic, civil unrest, violent political division, and economic uncertainty swirled around in my mind.

Our nation has wound itself up into chaos. On the heels of those thoughts emerged the confidence that even though sometimes the world appears ready to spin us right off into space, there is solid ground in Jesus.

The words I recalled are from the hymn, My Hope is Built. It was written nearly two hundred years ago, in 1834, by a man named Edward Mote when he was 37. He had already endured significant personal difficulties and national upheaval in his life.

Born in poverty to parents that were struggling pub owners, he was neglected and left to roam the streets of London.

His family rejected religion, but Edward became a Christian at 15 when he heard a preacher for the first time. Before that he said he was so ignorant that he did not even know that there was a God.

During his early years, he had witnessed the rise and fall of the Emperor Napoleon in neighboring France and England’s war with the newly formed American colonies.

Locally, there was civil unrest over unfair labor practices, and the mass exodus of citizens from the crowded English cities into rural areas, changing the British economy significantly.

As an adult, Edward made his living by cabinet making until he was 55. At that point, he was offered a position as a minister which he gladly accepted, leaving his successful cabinet business.

He became a beloved pastor who never missed a Sunday in 21 years, finally resigning from the church in 1873 due to failing health. He died a year later at the age of 77.

His headstone at the church where he served reads, “In loving memory of Mr. Edward Mote … the beloved pastor of this church, preaching Christ and Him crucified, as all the sinner can need, and all the saint desire.”

Supported in the Flood

“On Christ the solid rock I stand.
All other ground is sinking sand.”

As I sang these words this morning, the first two verses bubble up into my mind. Then, wanting to sing the entire song, I looked up all the verses:

My Hope is Built

My hope is built on nothing less
than Jesus’ blood and righteousness
I dare not trust the sweetest frame,
but wholly lean on Jesus’ name

When darkness veils his lovely face,
I rest on His unchanging grace
In every high and stormy gale
my anchor holds within the veil

His oath, His covenant, His blood
support me in the whelming flood
When all around my soul gives way,
He then is all my hope and stay

When He shall come with trumpet sound,
oh may I then in Him be found
Dressed in His righteousness alone,
faultless to stand before the throne

On Christ the solid rock I stand,
All other ground is sinking sand,
All other ground is sinking sand.

I often wonder what event, joy or heartache inspires people to write songs. As I continued exploring the history around Edward Mote’s lifetime, I discovered something surprising. Something that we can relate to as we battle the ravaging COVID-19 worldwide pandemic.

When Edward wrote The My Hope is Built in 1834, the world was in the throes of a global cholera pandemic. It was the second such outbreak, the first episode beginning in 1817 and ending in 1824. The initial occurrence did not reach England, staying mostly in Asia, but the second one did.

The second bout began in 1826 and by the time it ended, it had taken hundreds of thousands of lives worldwide, hitting hard in Edward’s neck of the woods.

Between 1831 and 1834, cholera killed over sixty thousand in England where the population was fourteen million. Three subsequent outbreaks in Edward’s lifetime took the lives of hundreds of thousands more.

How Hope is Built

When uncontrollable events occur, such as a pandemic, hurricane, the unexpected death of a loved one, or the loss of a job, it feels like we are losing our footing. It seems like we are at the mercy of whatever is coming against us to devastate us. And in a way, we are.

God sometimes allows us to experience the true instability of the world and its systems. He will expose human frailty and limitations.

Traumatic and destabilizing incidents show us that the only eternally solid place on which to build our lives is Jesus and his teachings. Our only security in pandemics, poverty, unstable relationships, traumatic loss, or ungodly governments is in him.

“Everyone then who hears these words of mine and does them will be like a wise man who built his house on the rock.  And the rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and beat on that house, but it did not fall, because it had been founded on the rock. And everyone who hears these words of mine and does not do them will be like a foolish man who built his house on the sand. And the rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell, and great was the fall of it.”

Matthew 7:24-27

Who would have thought that in 2020, scientists and medical professionals would not be able to stop a disease from ravaging every continent?

To date, this novel coronavirus has killed almost 100,000,000 people worldwide. That is a difficult number to even begin to comprehend and the future consequences from those deaths are yet unknown.

The Solid Rock

What a gift Edward Mote gave the world during another devastating pandemic in 1834.

My Hope is Built tells the story of the formidable love of God through Jesus that carries us to safety.  It recalls for us the assurance and comfort we have through his protection, not only in the storms of this life, but forever.

We cannot put our faith in “progress”, doctors, vaccines, governments, social systems, or in ourselves. But there is hope! Lasting confidence, joyful anticipation of good, and profound comfort are found only in the person of Jesus and in building our lives on his words.

Now may our Lord Jesus Christ himself, and God our Father, who loved us and gave us eternal comfort and good hope through grace, comfort your hearts…

2 Thessalonians 2:16-17